Lack of confidence, fear of abandonment … here is the specific profile of emotional dependents

Victor Hugo said, “There is nothing more valuable for anyone in this world than the current feeling.” Love essentially weaves a tough between two creatures, but does not have the same intensity for all. Some people win their attachment with peace: they accept the temporary distance as an essential breath, a place where everyone can thrive without any fear. For them, absence is not a danger, but a bracket that makes reunion more valuable. They move forward without fear, nourish their existence of other relationships, other pleasures, vaccination without their world. In contrast, for those who suffer from emotional dependence, love becomes vertigo, an emergency, an unquenchable expectation. Each distance, even small, turns into heart break. Each silence looks like a omen of abandonment. Their happiness rests on the other, and without him, everything can collapse.

Prisoners of this discovery for insurance, they forget, afraid, afraid that even a little rest will condemn them loneliness that they are very afraid. They are emotional dependent. “In its most common and massively used meanings, emotional dependence refers to an unsafe attachment, which is excessively taken care of, surrounded and advised, there is a lot of fear of low self -immolation and abandonment.” Psychological Claire Petin is called.

Emotional dependent: Who are they?

According to the clinical criteria of DSM-5, people with dependent personality disorder can suffer an extreme of emotional dependence, specifying Claire Petin. “A affectionate dependent person researches the secluded and frequent reinforcement, affection and verification with others,” to preserve a relationship, even to continue toxicity, forgets and adopts a sacrifice posture. They are left by people on whom they depend on, even in the absence of the actual cause.

Although often increases in romantic relationships, emotional dependence can reveal itself in any mutual relationship (family, friends, colleagues, etc.).

7 signs to identify emotional dependence

Do you lack self -commotion in your relationships? It is one of the specific behaviors of emotional dependence. But not only. Psychologist Claire Petin identifies 7 signals that show that you may be worried:

• You have trouble making decisions alone.Even the most harmless, and constantly looking for advice to assure you and calm your anxiety. This difficulty can motivate you to easily hand over your responsibilities and decide others for the essential aspects of your life, whether it is your career, your relationship, your presence or option of your clothes.
• You hang on relationships, even toxic Because you are afraid of abandonment and rejection, and you are afraid of loneliness. Thus, you do not respect your own needs and limitations and, because you avoid conflict at all costs, you risk accepting or passing away.
• Avoid expressing your disagreement With fear of losing your support or affection, with someone, which easily adds you. You accept conditions that do not suit you or present the wishes of others to avoid rejection.
• You lack self -use And you devalue yourself. In the continuous discovery of verification because you consider yourself less than others, you are extremely need to be convinced and constantly looking for signs of appreciation and attention from others.
• As a couple, you need to show your partner your love permanently And his commitment, otherwise you feel worried. Your honor of you largely depends on the evidence of his love, and a minor sign of distance or apathy on its part causes jealousy, doubt and/or insecurity.
• You are taken in relationship dependence And, at the end of a relationship, you quickly look for a new support, often without consideration. It is not so much person in itself that matters, but the role she will play in your need for attachment and reins.
• You find it difficult to be alone And you feel worried or trivial without surrounded without any attachment, as you do not appreciate your own company and do not think they can take care of themselves.

Do you recognize yourself in these signs: Are you necessarily an emotional dependent? No, Claire Petin tells us: Meditation, some of these signs to feel for time You are not necessarily suffering from emotional dependence“This is the intensity, frequency and effect of these behaviors on your life that can indicate a deep disorder,” experts say. If they remain and are a source of sorrow, it can be useful to talk to a mental health professional. ,

The risk of becoming emotional dependents is the highest

Where does emotional dependence come from? If the causes of this are not yet clearly defined, many factors can actually make it. “Some people are more sensitive to emotional dependence due to their history and their psychological creation, analyzes Claire Petin. Some negative experiences during childhood, can change the development of a safe attachment and weaken the self -ethics. So initial trauma can affect the relationship model in adulthood and can create a brilliant requirement for rebellion and verification, which can create a brilliant requirement, which can create a brilliant requirement, which can create a brilliant requirement, which can create a fantastic dependence and sentiment Get more vulnerable to fear.

• People who have developed in an environment, marked by an overgrowth or highly authorityThey may have difficulty in developing their autonomy and their confidence. Conversely, an unstable or unexpected environment reinforces the fear of leaving. If these people are not able to have formative experience (especially adolescents), which allow them to understand risk and responsibility, they will be able to seek a protective and assured figures in adulthood, which should be highly attached.
• People who have faced emotional shortcomings and have not benefited from a safe structure for a solid identity construction : Emotional negligence, parents rejection or abuse can create an unsafe attachment style, making them dependent on others to fill the lack of an emotional structure.
• People who give less respect to themselves, delicate narrowness : They feel incomplete or insignificant without others, do not appreciate their company and through mutual relations, especially couples, existing and giving meaning to their lives.

Emotional dependence can be a clear cautious, tolerance to toxic relationships, excessive presenting, difficulty in emphasizing themselves and sometimes, psychological, physical or sexual abuses. Note that professionally, it can slow down growth with fear of insurance and fear of autonomy.