These five words can drastically improve your relationship
Within a romantic relationship, there are phrases that are more valuable than others. When we imagine the words that have a lot of importance in the relationship, some naturally come to mind. First of all, “I love you”. Yet other phrases might be even more important.
“I love you” is a phrase, sometimes feared, sometimes expressed naturally, which aims to express one’s deepest feelings. A sign of commitment for some, these words also imply trust and respect. But there are phrases, more underestimated, which allow you to strengthen cohesion in the couple, to show your empathy, to be a real support for the other and, ultimately, to improve the relationship.
Offer your help
“How can I help you?” » What if these few words could change everything? In any case, this is what psychologist Jeffrey Bernstein maintains. “As a couples therapist, I have listened to many couples share their thoughts, their difficulties and their most intimate desires,” he assures. Psychology Today. I learned that this simple but powerful phrase can dramatically change the dynamic of a relationship. » Far from being the answer to all the difficulties that the couple and partners are going through, it is however an effective tool for working on empathy, support and connection within the relationship. Three essential elements for the proper functioning of the couple over time.
“It allows you to recognize your partner’s difficulties without judging them,” says the psychologist. It’s a simple but profound way to show empathy and open the door to connection. When you ask this question, you show him that you care about his needs and want to contribute to his well-being. » To amplify the benefits of this sentence, Jeffrey Bernstein invites us to ask this question with the real intention of supporting your partnerand not to avoid conflict or to relieve guilt. It’s also imperative not to assume what your partner needs. “Ask him questions and be open to whatever answer he comes up with,” he advises. Of course, just asking the question won’t be enough to really help someone else, you’ll have to act accordingly.
Working on empathy and cooperation: the key to a relationship that works?
“When couples get into the habit of asking each other, ‘How can I help you?’ they foster a culture of cooperation, empathy and connection. This shifts the relationship from competition to collaboration, where each partner feels valued and supported,” believes the psychologist. If these qualities can be useful in all areas of personal and professional life, as a couple, they play a key role.
“Empathetic people often enjoy stronger relationships, greater happiness and better subjective well-being,” says Derrick Carpenter, positive psychology coach, for Very Well Mind. In couples, empathy encourages prosocial and altruistic behaviors, increases kindness, stimulates cooperation and forgiveness, reduces aggression and judgment and allows for more fluid and effective communication.