These typical phrases spoken by addicted people

“Man is a social animal,” said Aristotle. All his life, he has evolved within a “social ecosystem” with which he has constantly interacted. It is therefore quite natural that he turns towards others to ask for help To a certain point When help turns into influence and the approval of the other is obligatory, the personality becomes dependent.

Preoccupied by the fear of being abandoned, the addict suffers from a feeling of unease or helplessness when he feels alone, which prevents him from making decisions, sometimes crucial, without the reassurance of others. Hence the interest in identifying the subtleties of language which reflect a propensity for dependence. The psychoanalyst Christian Richomme has identified typical phrases that can alert.

A disorder in its own right

In people with dependent personality disorder, the need to be taken care of can cause a loss of autonomy. Being extremely concerned with taking care of themselves, they become excessively dependent and submissive. This is the definition of MSD Manualwhich lists medical conditions and treatments.

Addicted people suffer from feelings of weakness, incompetence and lack of energy. They seek approval, fear abandonment, criticism and rejection. Among the different behaviors pointed out by Christian Richomme, we also find the difficulty in making decisions independently, the expression of low self-esteem and doubts about one’s abilities or even submissive or self-effacing behavior.

12 phrases spoken by addicted personalities

To help us become aware of our own dependence or to be able to read it in the language of our interlocutor, the psychoanalyst has listed 12 typical sentences that a dependent personality could pronounce.

• “Do you think this is a good idea? I really need your opinion before I make a decision.”
• “I’m having trouble deciding what to do, can you help me? I can’t make up my mind on my own.”
• “I can’t imagine my life without you, I would be lost without you.”
• “If you leave me, I don’t know what I will do, I have no one else to rely on.”
• “I don’t even know if I have enough strength to do this without your support. Do you think it’s a good idea?”
• “I’m so afraid of making the wrong choice. What would you do in my place?”
• “Whatever you want, I’ll do what you say. It’s better this way.”
• “You’re right, it’s my fault. I should have listened sooner.”
• “I really can’t handle this alone, do you think I’ll manage?”
• “I’ve never been very good at this, but if you help me, I’m sure I’ll get there.”
• “I don’t want to upset you, so I’ll do what you want, even if it’s not what I prefer.”
• “I’ll accept anything, as long as you’re not mad. I don’t like it when you’re mad at me.”

“Dependent personality disorder is often a defense mechanism in the face of a lack of self-confidence and a deep fear of abandonment,” recalls Christian Richomme. People with this disorder may have difficulty living independently and constantly seek approval from others, which can make relationships difficult to maintain over the long term. Psychological support, including cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), can help them develop greater autonomy and strengthen their self-esteem. »