“Without these moments”: Do you know 3 types of last time?

All of this begins with a final form, a last word, a final moment we do not know how to identify. Can we really guess “last time”? This is a question raised by philosopher Sophie Galabru, which was invited to a farewell party in a family house on an evening. An incident that is both joyful and poignant: a family separated from a region sent for a century, which is a place filled with memories and stories. At the intersection of celebration, rituals and renunciation, inspired them to a broader reflection on these moments when we close a door whether we would open it again one day. Or do they still survive us?

For Sophie Galabaru, there are various forms of the last time, which she gives details during an interview led by Psychology, journalist Helen Fresnel. Because “it’s finished” is not always enough to extinguish an attachment or passion. Time, elusive, does not comply with our decree. Thus, even when a last moment seems clear and final, it still exists in our memory, our regrets or our hopes. What is the last time existed? During this interview, the philosopher gives details under at least three main families.

All this started with a farewell party in a family house …

SG: Yes. This is a living experience a year and a half ago. I was invited by a family to convince him in a house to convince him. He organized the farewell. It was both happy and poignant. They separated from one area, one of which was taken care of by one century and each generation. It was a refuge for him. This very sensitive moment touched me a lot. He last picked up himself. Last arranging is fun… perhaps this is a fantasy, I said to myself, because okay, most often, we cannot estimate or prepare last time. We want to be able to honor him at the same time and at the same time, if we always knew about it, it would be unbearable. I wanted to find out this ambiguity: the last time desired, frightened, organized. This is the attraction of time, both amazing and precious, which spreads and leaves us.

According to you, there are three types of last time, can you expand them?

Sg: there is Last time we prepareWhether it is farewell to a place, a retirement or a mourning of an existence that should be with. I wonder if it is possible to estimate this moment completely. About beings, I do not believe this, because there is always a part of the experience that saves our imagination, especially when it comes to death. Then We have passed the last time And those who give an impression of spread in the form of accidents. To be left by a friend or love, going to a disappearance, if not sudden death. At the end, The last time we decrease By will and who represent a horizon of salvation. Is it really possible that this is the last time to be the case? I don’t think so. Pendants and grip do not disappear from voluntaryness.

To say is “it’s finished” not enough?

SG: No, it does not eliminate our desires, which obsesses us, what is. Because what we live and what we experience is procedural in nature. To encourage us, we take a decree to try to order in our lives, a kind of temporal tag. In fact, the time of life and the time of emotions is not according to our cutout. The weather is constant, but also odd: each moment is of a different nature, which is rich in unpredictable. The past, current and future are connected, caught like a living, biological raga. This is the period, not our intellectual sequencing.

Did you mean the last time does not exist?

SG: I think last time, most often, not an end. The reflections and emotions caused by the relationship continue as long as we get entangled in an emotional conspiracy. If one end is one last time and an end at a physical level, then our materialistic and scientific society forgets us that at spiritual, emotional levels, nothing stops. Or rarely. It is sometimes possible that a person does not observe us at all, no longer in our thoughts, that we now have nothing to him, but it is very rare. In addition, the question of a life after death is insoluble and remains open. Everything continues in terms of mind.

Even in the last case we hope, the desire to eliminate it, the desire to break it?

SG: Certainly, we can suck unbearable, unbearable situations at the last minute and for example, free ourselves from a grip. But decree is the safest way of end that we continue, basically, to be desired. In fact, it is not a question of fixing an account with vomiting count or reducing the final dose, it is a question of redirecting your desire, revising your qualitative relationship for matter or person: “I want drunk, intensity, but I see that it prevents me from loving, loving or working, is it a really desirable relationship for my life? What do you want in myself? Last time voluntary decree does not eliminate passion And attachment. It does not allow vending, it stimulates the fear of losing. You have to receive your passion and choose the option of qualitative scale: “Does it bring more pain or pleasure to me?” ,

What is happening in medicine often: patients come to consult, because at one point, the suffering is more than very happy …

SG: Yes. It is in these moments that the question arises: “Do you really have this person, this product, this object, this activity is as good to me in the beginning, or as I believe?” And does I lean me there? Does it respond to my deep desires? Sometimes it is sometimes a spicy relationship, a mesestime, lack of self -confidence that fuels these objects or cancels desires: we do not desire desirable, delightful, beautiful or energetic things Are. This is to be done to install the quality that we want to bring to ourselves and others.

This work, how do you apply it in your opinion?

SG: By questioning his happiness. Often, we are convinced that what is obsessed with us makes us good, we are intellectually or physically essential. But in the event of a grip, for example, the pleasure received is very low. He is always interrupted by pain. This is what Epicurian says: Anand is always good, but still registers it in a relationship over time. There are immediate pleasures that are very sorrow, excess alcohol, for example. What does it mean to give yourself a small pleasure that produces a much more painful effect in long term? There are small pains that are sources of permanent happiness, proud that we have to overcome difficulties. There are requirements to themselves that suffer people immediately, but who leave great happiness. You have to know how to evaluate qualitative bliss (interesting, beneficial, useful?) And temporarily (whether it is organized in a bear period?). Often, out of habit or cheating, we believe that such joy is necessary. But by re -starting your feelings, this one hour of bliss lasts for weeks. We should question the desire that he reacts partially to our desire only for joy and which is more depth.

How to prepare for the last time, when it is estimated?

Sg: Pay tribute to a place or a link that we want to leave And Happy is a beautiful thing attached to the past. As last time, it is a stallion that allows you to assess and improve the quality of our reports. When in our mind that creatures can end, we invest better; In our gestures, we bring more quality in our words; We also cultivate more severity, authenticity, beauty. Death should improve in a qualitative relationship for life, but should not have an upside count that attracts a count of these moments. Because at that time we become hostage with a temporary budget. And there it becomes unbearable. We always walk, we always feel default. For others, yourself, for time, becoming a point. Do not get into a fear that will push you to count and hoard. This is a net.

Is it not a bit complex, even if we live in a society that pushes it?

SG: Absolutely. We live in an accounting culture and an emergency society, where everything changes very quickly. But those who write, their role is to remember the time which is not a timetable. As Bergson would call a philosopher, there is a quality, a tone or color at every moment. I add that time is the first of wealth. This is not something that we have, but it is a plan of reality in which we can climb and compromise to live better. The duration is the one that allows us to exist, mature, create, love. Dare to join him. The first resistance is there: do not let yourself be stolen, let yourself be in your period, experience to see its beauty. Do not hesitate to spend your time through moments of laziness, contemplation, theft with loved ones. Every moment is the ultimate and unique, always already passed. How to face irreversible? One of my answers is to remember that the count is lost, generously returns to a hundred times. Another is to remember that physical things do not have the end of the life of the mind and heart. Even when a stop takes us small, there is continuity. Links remain. What was experienced in beautiful, good, joy never disappears.