This approach to life will allow us to be happier in 2025
From ancient wisdom to modern psychology, everyone interested in happiness notes its paradox. The Stoics once affirmed it, and the latest studies now quantify it: Our almost intrinsic need to please ourselves is actually counterproductive.
But how can you find happiness without finding it? Backed by scientific experiments, American researchers have revealed a different approach that shuffles the cards. According to their findings, denial of pleasure distracts us from our goals. So, to ultimately be happy, we have to break some preconceived notions, they teach us.
The pursuit of happiness leads to disappointment
As beneficial as it is, happiness, when it arises from overly strong inhibitions, can be harmful. While feeling happy is a good thing, overemphasizing the importance of a positive outlook can ultimately backfire and, paradoxically, make us unhappy. This is what psychology professor Brock Bastian and lecturer Ashley Humphrey at the University of Melbourne say. Federation University AustraliaIn a study published in Positive Psychology Journal And conducted with 500 participants, Australian researchers revealed that the constant pursuit of happiness may paradoxically hinder its fulfillment.
“When people overestimate their happiness, it is paradoxical that they may become less happy. Especially in contexts where they most expect to feel happy, the study authors explain. This tendency to expect to be happy and then find yourself disappointed or to blame yourself for not being happy enough is associated with greater depressive symptoms and decreased well-being. » Other experiments designed to encourage individuals to aspire to extreme happiness showed that participants often felt more frustrated than happy. This dynamic can be explained by a theory according to which heightened expectations, driven by concerns about the importance of happiness, can lead to a deep sense of disappointment. It is not that we are doomed to remain unhappy throughout our lives, this work suggests seeking happiness indirectly rather than making it our priority.
Stoicism to regain control of oneself
By pursuing happiness, we increase our feelings of loneliness. And here we are, immersed in the tyranny of happiness. This is the observation of psychologist Iris Maus of the University of California at Berkeley. His research has shown that the constant pursuit of happiness promotes disconnection and reinforces social isolation. To avoid this, experts recommend adopting a more calm posture while promoting acceptance of life’s ups and downs. And for good reason, the Stoics propose an approach to happiness that allows the individual to achieve peace of soul, which they call ataraxia.
You would be better off appreciating your destiny, changing your perception, letting go… His reflections help to put things in perspective, to gain possession of yourself. Seneca says, “The greatest obstacle in life is waiting, which depends on tomorrow and misses today.” The philosopher, an emblematic figure of Stoicism, believes that our unhappiness is linked to our concerns that do not depend on us (fate, death), to the loss of what we can control. However, he writes happy lifeHappiness is not in material things but in virtues. “The wise man is sufficient in regard to happiness, but not in regard to life. It has many requirements: all that is needed for happiness is a healthy, elevated mind, attracted by excellence and scornful of the mockery of Fortune.
To find happiness, concretely, contemporary experts suggest engaging in an activity that feels good in order to feel deeply happy. This may include engaging in projects that provide a sense of accomplishment such as volunteering or establishing daily routines that promote well-being, etc. I am alrightTo be happy, you don’t have to do anything just to be happy. A contradictory but saving approach.